As parents we have so much emotion tied up with our children. We want what is best for them, but we also want people to think they are as wonderful as we know they are. These two things do not always match up when it comes to school. Teachers want to tell us how we can best help our children to learn. They always have the best of intentions. Unfortunately, that is not always what we parents hear. We hear the fault they are finding in our children and we respond with the hurt that we feel. Conferences and meetings with teachers cannot be entirely objective because of this.
In my opinion children should be involved in parent teacher conferences whenever possible. For one thing it is a performance by their child which entices parents to be there. It also leads to better self reflection and self evaluation by the children. Having the student there takes pressure off the parents, it is easier to hear from your child what they struggle with, and creates the desire to help them not resistance. Additionally it sends a message to parents that the teacher really knows and trusts their student. Of course the teacher really does have to know the student well to involve them in the conferences. This makes more work, preparing the students. I believe the benefits outweigh the work.
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3 years ago
2 comments:
I am still not sure if I believe kids should always be included in parent- teacher conferences, but I am leaning strongly toward the side that says they should. In my experience, only one teacher for both my kids required that students be present at conference. My dyad teacher, sixth grade, includes students in conferences because she feels that it is important for students to hear what is said to avoid any misunderstandings and simply, because the conference is about and for the student so they obviously should be present. Other teacher or parent responses or thoughts?
I also not sure if parents need to always be at conferences, but I do know that it seems to really help if your student knows that the teacher and parent are talking to each other and that together they are going to hold that student accountable. Having the student attend conferences would certainly be one way to ensure that students know that the teacher and parent are on the same page, however that will only work if the teacher and parent have a positive relationship. I think that having the student at the conference if it turns contetious might not be the best thing.
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